(Cavalier-inspired) Wooing Poem

O, oft' I have stood under your window--
When you're not there, I feel so low.
Or you throw things at me as I serenade you
Gently, and hit me with your shoe.
But I do not cry, I sigh and
Compliment your graceful overhand
Pitch.  How I love you!  You look so nice,
If I could date you I wouldn't think twice.
Your glare is so handsome, your scowl
So grand; you're so cute when you growl
At me to get the hell off your porch.
Through blackest darkness I'd carry your torch,
Led by the light of your eyes.
I'll stand here forever.  I may not be wise
But dammit, I'm persistent!  So here I stand,
Patiently strumming my guitar, pick in hand
Waiting for you night and day.
If this doesn't work, I'll bet you're gay.